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TV CuckoldsA lazy, inattentive manc***d marries a hot, nagging wife. It’s a television trope, a device that allows for lots of storyline hijinks. The characters’ sex lives are barely implied or even nonexistant on screen, but what if 10. Temperance Brennan, BONESBones is no one’s doting, submissive wife. She is unemotional & unattached; early in the series we learn that she enjoys casual NSA sex. A frequent diatribe from her is that the anthropological need for monogamy is outmoded. Bones would take a lover & coldly admonish you for if you were upset by it. Temperance is also one of the more likely candidates for a cuckold pregnancy, as she would force you to confront the logic of reproducing with the most attractive and well endowed male available.9 Kim Warner, YES, DEARGreg Warner makes Phil Dunphy look like Malcolm X. Greg is the most cuckoldable husband in TV history. Poor Kim began her marriage as naive, sheltered white girl. She is the prototype for the sheltered, nerdy late bloomer. In real life, the Warners would eventually kick Jimmy & Christine out of the guest house so a BBC could move in and make himself comfortable around the house. Greg on clean up duty as Kim screams “YES DEAR!” would make for a very different and much more enjoyable program.8 Kitty Foreman, THAT 70’s SHOW Kitty Foreman is the nervous and kindly mom who always wants to please her family, friends, and neighbors. Over the course of the series, Red reveals himself to be a very repressed and sometimes distant man who is more about bark than bite. He has a gay brother and it is made clear that masculinity is a subject that gives Red a lot of anxiety. Meanwhile Kitty is often horny and the initiator türbanlı diyarbakır escort when they run upstairs. I could see Kitty being a submissive little pleaser who would come home with her hairy pussy full of cum to make a pot roast for an unaware Red. 7 Lois, MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLELois is one of the most dominant women in TV history. She wears the pants and Hal is absolutely her submissive in every way. Lois and Hal have one of the most active on screen sex life of any couple, but how do low income parents of 5 c***dren keep the spark alive? I’d imagine these two as the freakiest couple. Femdom, strap on, role play. Everything is on the table including Hal taking control whenever the mood strikes. In one episode, Hal intentionally tries to fatten Lois and lusts after her fat ass, he also once went wildly lustful over her whorish mandatory make-up makeover at work. Maybe Hal’s fantasy is for Lois to be a BBW who humiliates him, berates him and acts like a whore. Sounds good to me. Also of note, there is an actual cuckold storyline on the show. The mother of Malcolm’s wheelchair bound friend Stevie snaps out of her repressed Christian lifestyle. She runs out on her family, leaving her husband to have gang bangs and make porn. Later, she asks Stevie’s father to take her back as if nothing happened. Yes, this is all actually mentioned on the show.6 & 5, Debra and Marie Barone, EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMONDDebra and Marie are shrewish, angry, petty and instigate an awful lot of shit for two women firmly rooted in their righteous indignity. But look at the males on this show: milquetoast, whiny, lazy, selfish lumps. The Barone türbanlı diyarbakır escort bayan men are not the type of guys who introduced their wives into the lifestyle. They aren’t swingers or the husbands of a hot wife. They are just shitty husbands and Everybody Loves Raymond is about all the moments when the women have to suffer time at home and aren’t off getting fucked by real men.4 Kate Gosselin, JON & KATE PLUS 8Kate Gosselin gets a lot of shit but I think she’s kind of hot. She is a real type A cunt, a domineering and insistent force. She has as an overwhelming personality and she makes it clear how often she is disappointed. Not only wouldn’t Kate feel bad for cuckolding you, but she’d make you sit through a ten frame PowerPoint presentation demonstrating exactly why she is doing every detail of her affair. She’d be great at the humiliating talk too.3 Claire Dunphy, MODERN familyClaire is one of the sexiest cuckoldresses on TV. She hits a lot of the right notes, she’s a good mix of Type A, bitchy, high strung, dominant and promiscuous. The show frequently alludes to her party girl past and Claire fails to conceal that she is, at heart, a bad girl. Claire was hurt by a lot of guys and Phil is her sweet, loyal companion. Claire is a Modern woman, of course, so she has her Phil and then goes out for more. She would love taking control of young and inexperienced boys or succumbing to a hung man who is anything but marriage material. Claire would be the mom who gets caught up in a national scandal for texting nude photos to a shy boy in Alex’s class.Gloria cucking Jay was so obvious that it was too türbanlı escort diyarbakır easy to write about, Hayley is slutty and seems like she could take after her mom, Alex could one day be promiscuous, really this show is ripe for any of this stuff.2 Carol Brady, BRADY BUNCHThis one is definitely made more relevant because her on screen husband was played by a real life gay man. There’s familial cuckolding here and probably your most organic example of bi cuckolding. Mr. Brady would come home delighted to see the Mrs. with the milkman’s cock in her mouth. He’d love kissing some of the milk off her lips before going downstairs to get a glass of 2% to wash it down. 1 Carrie Heffernan, KING OF QUEENSCarrie is one of my favorite TV wives and someone who really helped me understand what I liked in the days before I was computer literate enough to go out and find a name for what I liked. Carrie gets her way. She yells at people who need to be yelled at. When people think she’s a bitch, she doesn’t care. She yells at Doug and she humiliates him in front of his friends. Both her and her father mock his body and several times on the show they tell him and others that he has a small penis. Carrie openly admits her attraction to Doug’s taller, better looking black best friend and several episodes deal with Doug’s anxiety over this. In one episode, Carrie reveals to Doug that she’d like him to speak in a Spanish accent so she can fantasize about fucking a Hispanic construction worker (played by Leah’s real life husband.) Before Carrie met Doug, she was a bar slut who wore the stereotypically “trashy Long Island” look with the big hair and cigarettes. At times in the show, when she is mad at Doug she wears her old “slutty clothes” and smokes cigarettes to antagonize Doug. She once tells a joke about sleeping with someone else and Doug replies, “I thought you were doing that all along.”And in the Hall of Fame, here are some TV wives who we don’t need to imagine cuckolding their husbands. Because they were cuckolded on the show.Skylar White, Nancy Gribble, Lois Griffin